Friday, January 25, 2013

Musings of the Almost Graduate


   I know I have to be patient, and on some days, waiting is easy. But on other days, when it seems like every other girl is a normal teen, with a typical life, waiting can be so painful.

  It’s these dreams that keep getting in the way. Dreams of being sought after. Dancing at the school dances with that special guy. Laughing with friends about trivial things. Carefree, happy days with no actual stress. Things that seem to happen to teens in books all the time. Or to every other teen around me. But life isn’t the same in books.

  Though it will be exciting, graduating and going on to better things, this year is just so full of endings. Opportunities are now gone forever, because next year, I won’t be back. The last dance, the last Valentine’s day, the last school play, the last classes. One part of me wants to say goodbye now, and just get it over with. The lingering can become so unbearable sometimes.

  Still a teen and yet almost an adult. It’s like being stuck between worlds, just awkwardly floundering and waiting for the next change. Things that used to matter simply don’t any more. Some of us are growing up already, while others have to be dragged by the ears.

  The future seems to be a looming darkness, unsafe and terrifying. Yet at the same time, the present will soon belong in the past and will hold no place for me soon. I have to grow up and move on. The next chapter will soon begin. 

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